Recap & review past 3 years of having this blog & life
Probably another post I’m talking to myself LOL nah jk I know some ppl will read it
I’m a little bit late, but August 20th this year marked the 3rd anniversary of ciciiful.com! So I’d thought I’d make a little recap of past 3 years & plans for upcoming year.
For the past 3 years, I probably didn’t use this place to its fullest. But I still want to do a little recap of what happened for the past 3 years on this blog and how it slowly changed, etc.
Ciciiful.com started August 2015 as some sort of a 2nd version of my previous website I had. I decided to close that website and got ciciiful, because the old name simply didn’t appeal to me anymore and wasn’t fitting to what I wanted to do.
It all started mostly with reviews and stuff that what pretty much related to my hobbies back then: cosplay, gaming (mostly League of Legends), make-up and figure collecting. Back then I enjoyed it quite a lot to build the blog all my own from scratch after the experience I got from the previous website, thanks to an ex-friend. While I didn’t post a lot, I was happy to have a little place for myself.
The second year of the blog was used pretty frequently, but all those posts are put on private pretty soon after. My life went pretty downhill (mostly mentally) and I tried to work my way back to a better life. My way of trying to get all my frustration & sad emotions out was to blog daily here and try to write down the positive things that happened that day as well. So pretty much some sort of dairy I was having, but on an online blog instead of a traditional dairy book thingy. It went pretty well for over 100 days, then I went to Hong Kong for vacation which kinda broke my streak hehe But I already felt better at that point and thought I could let it rest.
Later in the second year, I started to focus more on my Youtube channel with making unboxing/haul video’s which made the blog even less active. But even that just lasted a little over half a year, because I went to Hong Kong for 3 whole months without a proper laptop to edit my vids. Good luck continued to follow me and my pc also broke shortly when I got back from Hong Kong and I couldn’t repair it until 6 months later (June 2018). I did manage to get over 100 subs which I totally never expected to have and I’m grateful for it. These kind of number usually don’t matter to me since I’m not seeking for fame, but having people enjoying what I’m doing and make them happy is worth so much more to me.
2018 so far was mostly translating lyrics, especially VAZZROCK ones. At first it started, because of my interest and love to learn more Japanese through this way, but for some reason I started to feel like it was a chore after a few translations. This was totally not what I wanted since all I wanted was a fun way to learn Japanese and sharing what I’ve done to others if they want to read it. I’m not a Tumblr user or something, I don’t know how the community there works, so I also don’t always know if someone else have some something already or not. Not everything pops up in google search sadly. And suddenly over time I felt the need to rush all translations as soon I can work on them… I also never ‘promote’ those posts heavily besides just tweeting once about them, because I don’t feel confident in what I did and want to stay humble. This is also the reason why I rarely promote my blog, yt-channel and even my cosplaypages where I used to be a lot more active on. To me, it’s just that people will like or follow me when they genuinely do without putting the pressure on them to do so. Don’t want to come off as “oh, see me doing this and since we kinda know eachother, so I expect you to follow me and like my stuff”. I really want to stay true to myself and don’t need memes, shitposts, fake things or promote my stuff heavily to get attention. I just don’t care as much when nobody sees my stuff. It’s the experience of doing it that I truly enjoy. The acknowledgement of someone else is definitely a good thing, but I’m not doing all this for attention if you know what I’m saying.
Overall, the blog has been a little place to express myself and let out stuff I’m intrested in, etc.
Since I just paid my invoice on the hosting, let’s talk about my plan for upcoming year~! For the rest of 2019, I will be trying to combine my youtube channel & blog a little bit more. I feel like it’s a little waste if I don’t use my blog to its fullest.
Hosting also got more expensive this time, so yeah. I’m trying to take those babysteps as I’m in a pretty low point with my mind while trying giving my best to walk forward again. I pretty much lost my drive and blame myself for not having particular talents and being useless. But that’s a whole different storytime if I feel like posting such thing online one day.
So my goal is pretty much the same: sharing my hobbies and interests (and sometimes frustrations since it’s still an outlet for me). I will try to put less pressure on myself that I completely put on myself. Really want to keep this place a nice environment without any pressure/stress (unless I’m venting or talking about sad stuff), which is also a reason why I don’t have any ads on the whole website. I don’t need milions of views or earn anything (financially/materialistic).
Since I’m some sort of seeing this as a fresh start, I’ll working on changing the overall colourscheme and ‘logo’ of the website. At first I wanted a sweet cafe-like touch to it, but while I still like it since it has to do with one of my big dreams, I feel like I want something that matches more my personality rather than my dream. I want the blog to be more personalised that others can ‘feel’ it. Besides the design-update, I will also update my profile page and be more clear with my schedule. I don’t want to put pressure on this whole thing, but working with deadlines might help my overall life to have it more organized then just do stuff when I feel like. Want to have a nice rhythm in my life!
Upload more videos and linked to a blogpost
The most obvious one is to revive my yt-channel again and try to incorporate my blog as much as possible. For now I’m not sure which direction I want to go yet, but I really feel motivated to focus on a few review videos. I will also be doing an unboxing again somewhere next month! I still have old footage of unboxings I recorded last year, but to edit and upload them now doesn’t make a lot of sense to me.
And when it comes to blogposts only, I’m not sure what I still want to do. I mean I can put all my insecurities, anxieties and lifelessons online, but don’t think it’s a great idea to expose so much about myself and don’t want to look like I’m searching for pity, because I AM NOT.
Continuing with translations
I will be continuing where I left it off, but trying to put less pressure on me. This is pure for fun where I love to spend my free-time on. Will be trying to make a schedule (online/for myself – TBD) and see how to approach this chaos since I do have some drafts in progress, but either lost my touch or got too complicated for what my skill can handle. For now I will just finish them if possible, no matter if someone did it already or not. I already worked on them and even my sister scolded me for being like this afraid and said: “When 1 news source have said something about a certain subject, doesn’t mean another news source can’t report the same subject, right?”. She’s right and I can 100000% assure that everything I’ve done here when it comes to translations isn’t copied from work of others and won’t ever do it. Still want to keep this environment ‘clean’ since I paid to build this place and I’m not stupid to let that money go to waste for 4 years.
Sorry for the insanely long and maybe a messy post with both good & bad things while it’s supposed to be some sort of celebration, but I truly hold this place dear to my heart as it has an archive of memories. Especially memories where I started to learn to become more independent.
THANK YOU SO MUCH for reading this post & visiting the website, I hope to see you soon again with some content that’s more fun! Suggestions are always welcome through the contact form or comments down below. I’m also approachable on my social media! (don’t worry I don’t bite) Here are the ones I’m active on lately:
- Instagram (cosplay, anime & random stuff)
- Instagram (a more ‘normal’ account)
- Twitter (I’m a boring person, so don’t expect much and contemplating on making another acc just for this blog or namechange)
- Youtube (Lots of cringe on there rn)
I might also add some of my friendcodes from different mobage I’m playing on my profile page when I’m ready with launching the update!
Once again THANK YOU for the support and see ya soon~